Tonight will be our sixth night at Riley. This morning we were encouraged to hear that her white count finally made it up from zero to 84. If tomorrow brings another positive jump we’ll be able to go home. They are giving her platelets as I type because her platelets have dropped everyday since we got here. All this is totally normal from chemo, we just weren’t expecting it after this first dose. She isn’t feel sick at all, but I find myself growing more and more overcome with sadness as the days go by. During the weeks between treatment I had envisioned us being home together as a family, not in a hospital. I saw the kids playing in the yard and riding their bikes. Even taking cancer out of the picture, it just makes me sad to not be able to see her outside of hospital walls. I feel like she can’t be Izzy here (although she is wearing a sparkling super hero mask and cape while receiving platelets – it doesn’t get more Izzy than that). I began to look through old photos and found inspiration in seeing her in her fullness. I started to want to fight through my sadness for that.
I put together the photos and made a video. These four minutes encapsulate who she is, who she’s been and the impression she’s only begun to leave on the world. She has a calling on her life and the words that come out of her mouth amaze me sometimes. Of course watching this brings tears to my eyes, but they are tears I will use as fuel on days I don’t feel like fighting.
Izzy is a fighter. And you know what else. She has faith for her healing.